Walking through grief

When I first wrote my book, "From Mourning to Morning", I knew other people around me had obviously experienced loss but I never realized how as humans it is a binding experience. When we share our grief with each other the reality of these deep emotions connect us on a level few other experiences do.

I have heard from so many people over the years, some who have experienced the loss of a loved one years before others who have just walked this path and still others who know a loved one is close to dying and so they are grieving although their loved one is still alive.

Grief can be all encompassing, every thought, feeling, reaction, even the physical expression of grieving is so intense. Sometimes our grief takes us into a very deep dark place and we can feel as though we are physically sinking or falling or even being sucked down into a vortex. I remember laying on my bed after DJ's funeral was over, I closed my eyes and I was frozen, I couldn't move, I was weightless, I could hear every sound perfectly but I couldn't move or speak. It was terrifying, I remember crying out in my mind. "Jesus help me!" finally it broke and I just cried and cried in the arms of my husband.

I was exhausted in every possible way, not only feeling my own grief but all the people that were there for the funeral, I could see the pain and hurt in their eyes, I wanted to comfort them and perhaps in ways I did but I needed to shut down and so my mind said "OFF" and that's what I did, shut down. I slept that night for a few hours which is what I needed.

When I hear friends saying what is wrong with me I can't move on I always say, your not supposed to move on but through grief. There is no jumping over it or ducking under it you must walk through it! This is where psalm 91 means so much, "Yea thou I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for Thy rod and Thy staff they comfort me.

In other words, Jesus our great Shepherd will guide us through it, we will not stay in the valley of the shadow of death but we must walk through it.

I bless you with peace, Linda