Labor Day brought my husband, sons; Derek and David and me to New Mexico to visit my Father. It was a special time and I felt really good about us making the trek.
While we were flying over the Rockies, for a layover in Colorado I was struck with the timelessness of the rockies, of the sky and the heavens. At one point I just started to get so emotionally full thinking about the greatness of God and how mighty our God is. How awesome to know He has created all things and by Him all things are held toegther! I felt prepared for the second leg of the trip and I loved having my three guys with me.
We arrived in Alburqurque greeted by a typical day of sunshine and breezes, I forgot how brown everything is there even though it is the dessert, we picked up our car and checked into the hotel, then off we drove to see Dad.
When we arrived at the house Dad and family came outside to greet us and we sat around for a while and chatted. Dad looked suprisingly well and didn't hesitate to show us his newest war wound; an extensive scar from just under his collar bone to below the sternum. I couldn't believe how well he had healed. Dad is 77 years old, third heart attack and a diabetic so I was expecting a pretty down and out guy. Ha, I should have known better, he is afighter that's for sure and a joker all the way.
Some how through the jokes and converstaion I could sense that he was assesing his life and wondering what the future holds. His wife Claire is also quite ill with cancer and undergoing chemo for the second time. the prognosis isn't good. Dad cried several times and couldn't finish his thoughts at times because emotions overtook him. It was odd seeing this man who was tough as nails revealing his inner man to us, fear of the unknown was gripping his heart. We tried to assure him we were there for him and if he wanted or needed to move in with us we would arrange it but you know at one point Dad looked at those mountains and again with tears in his eyes said. " I love seeing those mountains". I don't think he will ever move to Georgia to be with us, I think he wants to stay in New Mexico. That was a good realization for me.
Dad is such and interesting fellow, he was and is a character, a ladies man, carefree in so many ways. A blue collar worker, an entreprenaur, a fighter, sportsman, and warrior. Independent in everyway and when he makes a decision he sticks with it right wrong or indifferent. Sometimes now he looks back and has regrets but you know I told him, "Dad, you did what you thought you had to do. We all make mistakes don't we? No one is perfect, letting go of these things is so important to having peace."
It seems to me the things Dad is really thinking about right now is how many people did he help during his life, what did he contribute to others. He told us some stories of letters he had received lately from men that once years ago Dad had encouraged or helped in some way, they were letters of thanks, I am happy to say he was and is an encourager and he would give you the shirt off his back. Dad didn't have the opportunity to go to school but he is a smart man, he is a researcher and once he says he is going to master something he doesn't quit until it is mastered. But he is most delighted in the people he touched, I guess we all get to this point in our lives and I believe we really all come to the same conclusion; How well did I love others?
I didn't know my dad that well growing up, little time periods here and there and then spent two months with him when I was sixteen. We didn't really stay in contact until I was married and had my boys. Then I read in scripture that I was supposed to honor my Father and Mother and so I decided to make ammends. I am so glad that I did. The past 20 years have been a blessing to me and my family, as I look at the man who just had triple by-pass heart surgery I can honestly say I think he is a special man and I am thankful God made me his daughter. I hope and pray we have him around a long time still, I pray he truly comes to know Jesus as Lord and Savior before he leaves this earth because I want to really know him, I want to have all of eternity to truly know my dad to spend endless days listening to his stories and hearing him laugh. Won't that be awesome!
